Michael Pantalon aims to teach us how to influence others. He gives us a scientifically supported method that gets people to take action because they want to. it's even possible to use the Instant Influence methodology on yourself.
Step #1: Why might you change?
The first challenge we must meet is how to put the person in a position where they are able to visualize themselves in the desired situation. In most cases, you will have identified what you want to change and what the desired outcome should look like. You need to phrase questions so that the person can put themselves in that desired situation. Ask questions such as: “Why are you doing X?” or “Why have you ever done Y?”. However, you want to avoid questions like “Why don’t you...?”, “Why haven’t you...?”, or “Why wouldn’t you...?”
Step #2: How ready are you to change?
On a scale from 1 to 10, where 1 means “not ready at all” and 10 means “totally ready”, how ready are you to make that change? The goal of Step 2 is to help you and the other person gauge their motivation. Don't place too much importance on the numbers, what's important is the process of thinking about what they might do.
Step #3: Why didn’t you pick a lower number?
This is where the person starts to uncover some real reasons why they are ready to change. The critical part is that the reasons for change are coming out of their mouth, and not yours. They are no longer being told what to do, and will now feel like they are ready to make a change because they want to.
Step #4: Imagine you’ve changed. What would the positive outcomes be?
Now, We can suggest that the change has already happened, and encourage the person to visualize the change in detail. Ask them what would be different in their life. What would they be able to do now that they've changed what they couldn't do before?
Step #5: Why are those outcomes important to you
Now we are getting close to the visible change itself. We need to once again frame the person we are influencing. ask them to dig deep for reasons to make the change. Again, the technique of reflection is valuable. The person needs to hear back how you understand how they’re hopeful, what they want, why they want it, and how they truly believe things could be better.
Step #6: What’s the next step, if any?
The final step no longer looks at the whys but turns to the how's. “What’s the next step, if any?” Adding those two little words “if any” is another way to reinforce the other person’s autonomy: it’s still up to them to decide whether there will be the next step. Now you are ready for one final action. Ask their permission to meet again after an appropriate time has elapsed to review progress and to recommit to the change. Taking a structured approach to encourage change can often be the trigger for the person to take control of themselves.